Hello, darling friends of The Thread,
I’m feeling reflective at the moment — must be the time of year, lol — and so for this piece, I have decided to write my Past Self a letter from my Current Self.
Journal prompts usually have us write these types of things the other way around, from our Future Self to our Current Self. And, in fact, I have a very similar (but incredibly cool!) prompt coming up in early January for my free creative community The Storytellers Club. If you’d like to have my writing prompts delivered to your inbox each week, you can click this link to join the club.
Anyway, as I was saying…
I had the idea for this piece drop in for me while we were driving to the hardware store last night. Nothing like a million-and-one jobs to do around the house before guests arrive for Christmas to inspire a creative writing piece!
In all seriousness though, the original inspiration has actually come from a little practice I have adopted recently.
When things feel extra tough or stressful or I have no idea how or when something is going to change or get better, I whisper a little mantra to myself:
“Remember where you were a year ago.”
It acts as a reminder of how far I’ve come, all that I’ve been through, and all that has alchemised from dreams into reality in the space of a year. Which, if you stop and think about it, is only just a snippet of our entire lifetime (if we’re lucky).
So, here goes.
A letter from me to me.
If you’d like to do the same for yourself, please feel free to use this as inspiration.
Sometimes we can really surprise ourselves when we take the time to sit, reflect and write about all that we have overcome and all that we have achieved. Especially in the space of a year.
I hope you enjoy this piece. x
Dear Sonia of December 2022,
It’s one month today since you moved to Lennox Head. You and Chris finally made all of those epic interstate and real estate moves and you now get to call this slice of paradise on Australia’s east coast… home.
Now, I know the house looks like a sad, daggy relic from the late 90s/early 2000s, but I promise that a year from now it will be beautiful. Don’t get me wrong — it won’t be finished — but it will be a complete transformation from what it is now.
Picture this: natural stone travertine floors, brand new wool carpet, curved (white!) walls and archways, a stunning and spacious open plan kitchen, dining and living room, bifold stacker doors that open up the north side of the house, a much bigger outdoor entertaining area, and a huge backyard with lush green lawn. Yes, really.
It’s a far cry from the olive green walls, maroon bathroom, purple kitchen, angular walls, weirdly intrusive bulkheads, and the dark, dingy rabbit warren you’re currently living in and frantically trying to paint white before your Christmas visitors arrive.
Let me tell you though, this is a renovation like no other. But more on that later.
As you move into 2023, you’ll feel so hopeful — keep hold of that hope, because that is exactly what will see you through one of the toughest years you’ve experienced.
I hate to burst your New Year bubble, but it’s true.
2023 will crack you, bend you and break you.
But you will find such a deep reserve of faith, hope, trust, surrender and resilience within you, that you will be able to piece yourself back together, again and again and again.
Like the Japanese art form of Kintsugi — putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold — you will glue yourself together in this way and in those cracks will shine through the gold of your experiences. It sounds poetic and beautiful, which it is, and it will hurt like hell… but it will also be profound and powerful. Remember, sweet little spiritual starlight, you signed up for this.
Home will be a dominant theme of your year.
How could it not be with the renovation you and Chris have planned?
It will be huge, messy, stressful, chaotic, relentless and expensive. You will be let down by people, taken advantage of by people, and disrespected by people… and you will also find really wonderful people who truly want to help and do a good job for you (and not overcharge you). This renovation will teach you both so much about what’s important, being adaptable and open to change mid-process, and when to stop. That last one, especially.
Obviously, money will also be a big theme for you, as you will be in charge of the renovation budget.
I know you don’t want to be, but it’s OK. You won’t do an amazing job of it and there will be so many times you’ll wish it was someone else’s problem but you’ll get to the finish line of what you will end up calling Phase 1 of the renovation and you’ll be glad you did it.
You will have proven to yourself that you are worthy of receiving and having/holding money and you are a responsible custodian of it. Of course, let’s be real here — you still have lots of room for improvement in this arena, but we both know we are at peace with being a work in progress for the entirety of this lifetime.
Trust yourself (and Chris). You both have excellent instincts and you know what you’re doing… despite what others may try to tell you. Stand your ground. Be clear and firm. This is your home and you get to have what you want.
Now, I wish I could also tell you to take your time, not rush, and have a healthy balance of work, rest and play… but we both know who you are married to so I won’t BS you.
This renovation and this year will be tough on your marriage.
You will both be under immense stress, pressure and deadlines… and we all know how that can impact a relationship. This is where each of your individual resilience will shine in your partnership. In December 2023, you will have been together for 19 years. You’ve been through so much together and this is just another chapter.
Without giving too much away, remember that patience and kindness are always the way to go. You don’t have to understand his process or be able to see his vision, you just have to love and support him as best you can. Always make him feel like you are on his team because you are. And you know that, no matter what, this is a good man with a great heart and he loves you unconditionally — he will prove this to you several times throughout the course of 2023. BELIEVE HIM and believe in him, boo. That’s all he needs from you.
This year will also be tough on your mental health.
You will thank yourself for all of the years of mindset work and personal development you’ve undertaken and the way you have coached your clients within your own business… because you will draw on all of that (and more) to be able to keep going.
And there it is — my one piece of advice for you for 2023:
KEEP GOING. YOU’VE GOT THIS.
And holy wow, do you ever.
Believe it or not, you will develop a healthy and consistent relationship with exercise. I know, it’s actually true babe! You’ll do away with all the ways you’ve been told to do it over the past couple of decades and just do what actually works for you. And. It. Will. Work!
The flow-on effect will ripple throughout other areas of your health and well-being, too. You’ll start prioritising your nutrition and hydration again and, without really trying, you’ll drop that extra weight you’ve been carrying for the past three years. The beautiful thing about this is that you won’t even care about the number on the scale, you will feel different and you’ll just know that energetically, you were ready to shed that weight and all it held for you.
The other magnificent thing that will happen for you in 2023 is that you will finally decide that you are done with hiding yourself from the world.
You will become a more vibrant, confident you: the woman you truly are.
You’ll start letting the world see you — from the way you dress to the way you hold eye contact with people, laugh and engage in conversation… like a flower gently unfurling its petals, one at a time, so too will you.
This will not only spark a new aliveness in you but also in your online community who will respond with fervour. The ripple effect will have begun to take place.
What’s magical about this is it will also inspire your creativity and your writing like nothing else has in a very long time.
You’ll make decisions in your business that are long overdue. You’ll do away with directives from other people you outsourced your power to. You’ll reclaim your identity and your art, and it will be fun and exciting and without pressure, because you’ll make money through your work and your business, and your writing will flourish because of this.
Also, after a throwaway comment from Chris asking when you’re going to publish your book, a dear friend will send you an Instagram post that will change the trajectory of your writing career. You’ll apply to be part of a book collaboration… and: spoiler alert — you’ll be accepted! Yes, my dear, in 2023 you will become a published author, and it will begin with one chapter in one book.
All of this takes us to the end of November 2023.
As I sit here, writing this to you on 14 December 2023, I feel like even more has happened these past two weeks but it’s too soon to speak about.
The energy that’s around at the moment is intense and frantic and high speed.
Transformation is sparking and crackling and happening, what feels like, every second of every day. It’s a lot.
Yes, it’s been a helluva year. Heck, we both know it’s been a helluva three years.
And honestly? I don’t think it’s quite over yet.
But to repeat: keep going, you’ve got this.
I’m saying that to myself — present day — as much as I’m saying it to you, a year ago today. Because… I can feel the change. I can sense the good stuff is on its way. In fact, when I remember where I was a year ago… where you are now… I’m reminded of how much has changed since then and how much I have in my life now that I had only dreamed of and wished for back then.
The days are long, but the years are short, as they say.
And also — a lot can happen in a year. (Heck, even a day!)
Keep trusting that everything is unfolding as it should and that everything happens for you in your own divine timing. It doesn’t have to look like what everyone else has nor will it probably look like what you think it will — and that, my dear, is the magic of the universe. You will get exactly what you want.
It doesn’t matter what it looks like, it matters how it feels.
And you being you, you’ll know it when you feel it.
Righto, my love, that’s it for now.
I can’t wait to look back and see what I’ll be saying about 2024.
But in the meantime…
Take exquisite care of yourself. Keep holding the energy and the vision. Love the people that (truly) love you. And remember to have some bloody fun along the way!
You deserve everything you desire for yourself… and more.
And it’s all on its way to you.
I promise.
With love from Sonia of December 2023
HAVE SOME FUN ALONG THE WAY. You deserve that.
There's a website called Future Me (https://www.futureme.org/) where you can actually write a letter and schedule it to get delivered to you, or someone else, in the future. It's been my New Year's Eve tradition the last year or two and I love getting the letter back so much. There's always a bit of "eh that didn't go how I thought" and "oh yeah I was feeling that" but it always, always makes me smile.
KEEP GOING YOU HAVE GOT THIS.
“It doesn’t matter what it looks like, it matters how it feels.” A 2023 gem right there 😘💜